Sunday, September 19, 2010

Anonymous thoughts....on my blog :o)

Confession, I keep writing August when I am putting down a date...and we're halfway through September. Crazy. I'm going to try to be better at writing here--so here's today's entry:

I went to Lance's farewell today, he's on his way to New Zealand on October 18th. He has grown up so much. It really excites me to see all of my siblings developing into these great adults. It's like watching a ripple grow in a pool of water--they will be an influence for good for so many. I adore them. I'm excited for Lance to go into the mission field.

Kelly has been accepted at the Utah School of Massage Therapy and will start school on the 17th. I'm so excited for her. I know that she will do so well there--and I'm looking forward to bartering for some back massages. :o)

I taught the lesson in Sunday School at church today and learned so much. Can I just say that I love that we have a living prophet and apostles? As I prepared this lesson I came to realize how close I feel to these people that I've never met, because they love the Lord--they are His servants--and they're here to help me. I am so excited about General Conference. I can't even tell you how excited I am. I've already started a list of questions that I want to find answers to as I listen. I know that you're curious--but no I won't tell you. :o) You'll just have to write some of your own.

After church I sat in the warm sun and read the Ensign cover to cover. I haven't done that in a long time. There were so many things that I needed to hear...or ummm, read. But out of everything, I think the biggest take always were some thoughts that came to me after just sitting there for a bit. We have a God who loves us...that's all I have to say. Life just isn't quite fair...it's better than that. :o)

Friday, September 10, 2010

Thoughts Inspired by Nothing Else Matters (Apocalyptica)

What if the defining moment of your life will happen today? What if every thing you had ever done up to this point was in preparation to those seconds of decision that would happen within the next hour? What would that moment look like? Would you be courageous? Would your moment be loud? Would everyone recognize it for what it really was? Would it win the war? If you missed it would you get another shot?

I think that your defining moment would just burst into seed and give you so many more. I love the way live unfolds as you live it. It's the present we are still unwrapping. It's the wonder of rounding another bend. It's the greatest mystery. And when all else fails we drop our shoulder and run full speed--bracing for impact.

I find myself continuously facinated...I'll never get tired of it...trying to shape the life that shapes me--feeling the perfect mix of power and helplessness. This is all I have...one lifetime to claim as my own. One story. One path to travel. And like my childhood, and my college years, and this past summer...one day it will all just be a collection of memories. Somehow all of the places and people and conversations simmer together and create something that cannot be defined in a single word.

People are so complex. Sometimes I just look at them and sit in awe of the complexity--all of the hopes and fears make them each so unique. So self-aware and yet, so unconscious of the way each decision affects everything around them. I wonder if we'll ever really see and understand the influence we have on all around us.

If that defining moment comes today I hope you step up to it. And even if no one else recognizes it for what it is--I hope that you will. I hope that you are the ultimate warrior in the battles you must face. Remember that the greatest strength lies in kindness, in hope, and in reverence. When we develop those characteristics we discover Home, and that nothing else matters.

Monday, August 23, 2010

The Next Phase

Now that the trip to Guatemala is over I've been searching and searching for the next phase--the next project--the next set of goals. But I know that what I need to work on more than anything else is my relationship with Heavenly Father.

I've noticed that my relationship with my parents has changed over the last couple of years--they treat me as an adult, and not just as their child. I've also become aware of a change in my relationship with my Heavenly parent--who is also giving me opportunities to learn and develop. I realized today that his roles have been constant. The roles that I know He held in the past continue to be pertinent today. For example, He is the Creator--and my understanding of the creation also helps me to understand how He continues to set up moments full of beauty--because He values it. I also learn from this role that I can follow His example and create beauty and grandeur in my life.

He also holds the roles of teacher, parent, and light bearer. There is no other relationship that is more important than the one that I can have with He who knows me best. I have a lot to learn--but I'm in the right place to absorb all that He wants to teach me.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

On the Way Home From Guatemala July 19, 2010

I’m on the plane, flying over Guatemala, and headed back to Utah. It’s been quite a trip and I learned a lot. Prepare for some rambling. :o)
First of all, it hit me as I was there that the people in the Polochic Valley were no different than the people in the U.S. – there were differences in location, possessions, and language – but at the core we were very much the same. It made me want to serve in my community more.
They had a light in their eyes – because we couldn’t communicate verbally I was intensely aware of the non-verbal communication on both sides. It’s true that most communication is non-verbal. We could communicate love through our eyes, and by the way we interacted. They were such a loving and trusting people. When we would ride by on the cattle trucks (our method of travel from village to village) they would wave and the kids would yell “Gringos!” Their big beautiful smiles were amazing. (P.S. I loved riding the cattle trucks with a passion that cannot be described in words. It was fun and the scenery was so beautiful).
On Saturday night a local mariachi band come to the school near our camp (in Nueva Conception) and played their giant…xylophone looking thing. It sounded fantastic. We all danced – pulling Ketchi children, teens, and adults up to the basketball court to dance with us. I was amazed with how trusting the parents were as we pulled their kids out to the court and whisked them away. I danced a lot with a cute little girl named Angela. When the party was just about over the rainclouds burst and it poured. We all squeezed under a large white tent and waited for the rain to let up. Some danced in the rain. :o)
It down poured every night…usually around dinnertime and then again in the middle of the night. The storms woke up a lot of those in the group—but I don’t think it ever disturbed by sleep. I slept in a sleeping bag on the floor of a community center. I slept between Katherine (Rachel’s 18 year old sister) and Meghan Bear (my new friend and travel partner).
Back to the trust—I loved how they would look at me with so much love. All week I traveled with the medical and dental group as I taught the Health and Sanitation class. I was given two or three people every day (they rotated) to help me teach. We needed to have everything translated into Ketchi, so when we could we would use Joey or Jace to translate directly. When they were busy elsewhere we would have one English to Spanish translator and another Spanish to Ketchi translator. It was quite the process, but we tried to have as much of a discussion as possible.
The class would go something like this: I usually taught the first three of the nine points we covered and I’d say: “Welcome to our class. We’re glad to have you! You have come today to see the doctor and the dentist, but the thing that you learn in this class will prevent you from getting sick in the future. We know that you already know many of these things, so we want you to tell us how to be healthy in this area and to share these ideas with each other. First we’re going to talk about nutrition. What foods do you eat to be healthy?”
It was in this portion of the lesson that I learned that they’ve tried to grow vegetables – but their efforts have been unsuccessful. Choice Humanitarian is working to find solutions to their agricultural problems. Tanner (one of Choice Humanitarian’s interns) and Daren (who I traveled with) are going to teach individuals in villages – those who want to participate—how to grow vegetables. They’ve run into issues with the high nickel content in the soil –it throws off the PH balance in the soil. Also the ground is too cold, making it necessary for them to plant in raised beds. And the seeds are being washed away by the torrential rain—they’re teaching people to cover the seeds with banana leaves. Someone also told us that they had problems with the insects. Who would have thought it would be so hard to grow veggies? The locals ate mostly corn tortillas—and sometimes that was all they ate. It was difficult to grow grass, or at least to have good grazing areas with the steep inclines in that mountainous area. As a result their cows looked pretty rough. Everywhere I looked I felt I was stuck in the “Emperor’s New Groove” movie. :o) Anyway, I’ve never been so grateful for vegetables.
As I taught I tried to look the women in the eyes and tell them I loved them—without words—they communicated that love back and it was awesome. I haven’t felt that loved and trusted by perfect strangers since I was serving in New York. I also felt so loved by the SHe group. Those 60 volunteers really were cream of the crop. Every person there was hardworking, successful, talented, intelligent, professional, spiritual giants. I did a lot of listening – and I realized that I haven’t done a lot of that recently. Also, boys that had girlfriends were really kind and friendly to me—and I realized that I’ve lost that essential element of being nice and becoming friends with boys—even when you’re not interested romantically. I’ve been trying to cut out everything but the essential for so long that I’ve forgotten to just be friends with everyone.
IT was so good for me this week to be away from work and more work and to just talk to people, listen to people, serve, and appreciate the beauty all around me. The people were as beautiful as the scenery we were surrounded by. We brushed our teeth at this outdoor sink that they set up—it had a gorgeous view of the valley and I just loved brushing my teeth there.
We slept in a large with a concrete floor—it was a community center and had a covered porch where we ate all of our meals. The food was delicious all week and I know I gained weight. We had these luxury port-a-pottys with a water pump that flushed the toilet and another that washed your hands. It was phenomenal—they never even smelled bad.
When I received the call to serve in New York I was a little disappointed because I wanted to serve in Central or South America. I came to know for myself later that I was called exactly where I needed to go. But it was so cool to come down and serve in a different, small way. It was great to have that experience—and also to see how difficult it truly would have been to serve there. I have a new level of admiration for the missionaries that are called to a third world country. It had a great time, but I’ll be honest, when our 8 days in the Polochic Valley were over I was ready for a hot shower and a soft, clean bed. As I sat there during our sacrament meeting in the Polochic Valley I realized that Heavenly Father had let me do and have all of the things that I’ve ever wanted. I taught health and sanitation classes that I put together to hundreds of Ketchi-speaking Guatemalans. We taught about 4 – 6 classes for 5 days with about 30 in each class. We taught them in schools, shelters, and huts. It was so surreal. I lost count of how many times I would just stop and realize: “I’m in Guatemala.”
Back to the class, after nutrition we talked about what we should do if someone is dehydrated—we had a re-hydration mix composed on 1 liter of water, ½ tsp salt, and 8 heaping tsp sugar or cereal.
Next we talked about how to know if water is clean. It seemed that many knew they needed to boil water—but the answers that came back on the length of time varied. We explained that 20 minutes was necessary to kill the bacteria that caused disease. Many didn’t have a way of knowing when 20 minutes had elapsed—and we explained that if they put a grain of rice in the water then they would know when it had been 20 minutes, because that’s the amount of time it takes for a grain of rice to cook. They seemed excited about that concept.
Next we talked about the importance of washing our hands. Elizabeth—who helped teach the class one day—drew a story on the chalkboard that we continued to use. It showed how feces can be transported via hand. It showed the particles travel from animal to child to a mother preparing a meal for the family. We also talked about using soap, washing our hands, washing our bodies, wearing shoes, ventilating our houses while cooking, and some important aspects of oral hygiene.
Quick note: When Elizabeth was teaching the part about bathing she asked, “What is something that we should do everyday to stay clean?” She then indicated she was giving a hint by “scrubbing” her arms and stomach. “What am I doing?” She asked. The Ketchi and Spanish translators gave us the answer from the Ketchis: “Scratch yourself?” :o)
By far, the best part of the class was when the newly trained local dentists—Carlos and Sebastian—would come in and teach the Ketchis how to brush and floss their teeth. The Ketchi people would sit there watching intently. I loved that there was no translation. They were being taught in their own language—by one of their own. That was our vision—that was what we wanted—for them to teach each other—that’s how this training becomes self-sustaining. The dentists and health workers were trained in the morning, and the Health and Sanitation classes were taught one after another in the morning as well. Then the Dental and Medical clinics started at noon, and we’d teach 1 to 3 more classes in the afternoon. Everyone had to come to our class before they could be seen.
I know that they pulled over 400 rotten teeth in the dental clinic. A baby came in that needed an IV started because it was so poorly nourished, a man came in with an abscess on his arm…etc. It was an exciting group to be a part of.
On Thursday we took a break and bought woven bags at a market prepared for us by the local women. I love my bag—it’s pink and orange. We had a talent show with a local ward one night. We divided into groups and were invited into homes. The homes were set up as complexes with a separate building for a kitchen, and often a separate washroom for laundry. The homes were simple and there was very little in each one. They had pretty little gardens and some strung up clotheslines over the gardens and along the outside walls of their homes. The floors were swept, made of that familiar red clay that was everywhere. The roofs were often thatched with layers of dried palm leaves. I loved the way that they thrashed everything together. I also loved the way they painted their schools and other public buildings these beautiful melon pinks, greens, and turquoise blues. It was beautiful.
Most of the people in the classes were women and children. They (the women) wore these beautiful, brightly colored croqueted tops over a cupped tank top. They also wore skirts made of long panels of fabric that they gathered with a string at their waist. They aren’t shy about breastfeeding in front of anyone and everyone—so I saw a lot this week.
From what Joey and Jace were telling us it’s common for a 20-something year old guy to sleep around and find a good cook in the 14 – 16 year old girl and then start a family. There were lots of teenage girls breastfeeding and I didn’t think much of it until I thought about my sisters. I’m grateful that our culture is more protective of our girls.
Like I mentioned previously, our group was just a collection of powerhouse people. I was closest to Catherine, Rachel, and their brother Adam. Also Meghan Bear, Wendy, and Mark Degraph (the four of us performed “The 3 Little Bears” as a musical number for the talent show). I adored our Choice leader, Emily Fransen, who is just a gorgeous and graceful jungle diva. She’s phenomenal. Joanne was the 75-year-old Choice volunteer that I want to be like when I grow up. :o) Jace and Joey were great friends. It was just a great group all around.
As I go home I have a bunch of goals—but if I accomplish nothing else I just want to be balanced, grateful, loving and helpful, and happy. What a blessing this trip has been. Heavenly Father has answered my prayers He is, as He always has been, so good to me.

In Guatemala July 13, 2010

The past two days have been awesome. We (the medical team) took a cattle car across this beautiful collection of vistas. I’ve been teaching the Health and Sanitation classes in a hut with two interpreters (English to Spanish and Spanish to Ketchi). I feel like I’m in Star Wars taling to the Ewoks and I listen to the translation). :o) The people are amazing and the kinds have been so much fun. When the class isn’t running I’ve been playing in the grassy area with them. They’re so cute! I love this.
Lessons I’m learning: Take time to play with kids, the ability to communicate open the door to opportunity—temporally and spiritually, you can do things that you didn’t think you could do, 80% of communication is non-verbal (show others that you care about them more than just with your words), make friends with everyone, an efficient life doesn’t make effective life, say “thank you” often, LISTEN loudly (show that you care with your body language), slow down and listen, it’s better to try than to give up (speak English do the best you can – some will get through, be more open, choose how to live your life.

On the Way to Guatemala July 9, 2010

So the adventure begins. Right now I’m on a plane over Mexico—on my way to Guatemala with Singular Humanitarian Experience (a subset of Choice Humanitarian). The past two weeks included some crazy deadlines and a lot of work. I’ve been working with Tyler Delangue and Rebecca Bordero, as well as others, to create Job Aids for medical procedures and a lesson outline for a Health and Sanitation class. The process went something like this: Tyler gave me six topics that he wanted covered as Job Aids. I looked through the book called, “Where There is No Doctor” and got all the info that I felt should be included, typed it up the material in shared Google Documents. Tyler and Leanne looked over the material and added more. Then we share the Doucments and Catherine who translated them into Spanish. While she was translating, I formatted the English Job Aids—adding pictures that Rebecca. (She scanned and me emailed them to me after I specified which ones I wanted from the book.) When the formatting was adjusted and approved I copied and pasted the translation into the English Job Aid. It was quite the process –but it was awesome seeing it come together with each individual’s contributions. I printed and laminated everything –I’m still in the process of putting the laminated sheets into notebooks (3 ring binders) and cutting out the handouts and last few job aids.

IT was a really busy morning and I was running and I was running around everywhere. It was quite a relief to get to the airport. Sara Amodio dropped me off on her lunch break—she sure is a great friend. As I sat at he gate I noticed a woman wearing REI sandles and carrying an REI jacket and backpack—it was a good bet that we had the same destination so I asked her. Her name is Rachel and she is my new role model. She is so intelligent, accomplished, fun, kind, and beautiful. She’s the mother of three but she’s in much better shape than I am—she’s a tri-athlete. It sounds like she has an awesome husband—she’s just great. She met two other expeditioners on our first flight: Joey and Jace. They served their mission in the Polochic Valley and they have so much information to share. They’re both so funny too! We had a five-hour layover in Las Vegas—so the four of us have become great friends.

I’m excited! This whole trip (hopefully) will provide a great opportunity to help and also enjoy –and just slow down. I’ve been so blessed.